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Chance Meetings

When I was in high school, as was the custom then, the MorningNewspaper would list notable accomplishments of young people around the state. Mostly, it was listings of students who had gotten scholarships or won awards for various skills such as speech or math. But one day, I read the name of a fellow student who was in the Boy Scouts. It seems he had attained the rank of Eagle Scout, the highest advancement rank in Scouting. This is indeed a high accomplishment as only about four percent of all Scouts ever reach this level and something, I would think, to be proud.

But, I guess, each person deals with life in different ways. Let me explain. I saw the student the day after his name was published in the paper and congratulated him on his attaining Eagle Scout status. His response sadden me. What he did was threaten me saying he did not want his friends to know that he was an Eagle Scout. I can only speculate as to why he would not want his friends to know what he had accomplished. Was he fearful that his friends would think less of him? I don't know but, if so, one wonders what kind of friends he had.

I was reminded of him in relation to the recent national controversy over whether photos of flag draped caskets of U.S. soldiers killed in Iraq should be published. It seems the current administration, for whatever reason, feels that no one should see such photos. In fact, someone who published some photos was fired from her job.

I think I can understand how the grieving family of some soldiers may not want any publicity about their son or daughter's casket coming home and I'm certainly not going to stand in judgment of them. But I think these people could perhaps take some comfort if they understood the depth of caring and grieving we all feel when one of our young men and women falls in battle. I wish they could understand that the these mothers, fathers, brothers, and sisters do not stand alone. That a country proudly stands beside them, whether they support the war or not, and that the healing process can be easier when they can accept the love of others.

There is a posting from U.S. Marine Lieutenant Colonel Strobl that is an account of escorting home the remains of one Lance Corporal Chance Phelps who died in Iraq recently. I don't know if the post is apocryphal or not, but even if it is, it doesn't matter. What matters is it tells the powerful truth of who we are. If you can read that post and not have a tear come to your eye then something is wrong with you.

I know the story is true, even if the details may not, because I have seen the respect and reverence paid to the returning remains of soldiers who died in the Vietnam War. To this day, when the unidentified remains, in those same flag draped caskets are brought to Hawai'i for identification at the Army Lab, there is a solemn ceremony, usually televised on local TV news.

I know the story is true because when my father-in-law was laid to rest, the Honolulu Police force turned out by the hundreds to honor him. They even shut down the main highway through town to give a clear road to his motorcade to the cemetery. Once at the grave site, a U.S. Marine Corps detachment provided full military honors to their fallen comrade.

I want every grieving parent to know that they don't stand alone in their sorrow. That "from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they here gave the last full measure of devotion -- that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain; that this nation shall have a new birth of freedom; and that this government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth."

Aloha!